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Monday, February 6, 2012

true bistro

i have a really lovely restaurant to share with you today...



it's vegan and it's in somerville.



no, really, i promise it's good!





trust me.

start with the black bean and plantain torte with salsa verde and vegan sour cream. throw in an izze soda (or go with one of their many wines/cocktails/nonalc drinks).

then, you must order the phyllo purse stuffed with seitan and squash.


and a vietnamese crepe that you'll find really hard to believe doesn't contain egg.

don't be like us and completely neglect to notice the hot sauce that was served alongside.

savour the crunchiness with your newly healed wisdomteethless mouth.




proceed to dissect the purse with glee.



wish that your real purse tasted like this.



of course you can't leave without dessert! what are you thinking?? (that just because you're going to a vegan restaurant you're going to be abstemious? pshhhh)


friend: "i have a feeling we're going to end up with the coconut torte."
me: "why would you think that?? not at all!" [internally: okay i was set on the coconut torte ever since i saw the menu online but how in the world did you know that?] "am i really so predictable?!"
friend: "well....... i have a sample size of 1, but i just have a feeling."
me: "okay. i'm going to look at the menu again just so that i can order something BESIDES the coconut torte."

[waitress brings the dessert menu]

me: "excuse me, does this mango-macadamia crumble have ginger in it?"
waitress: "yes, it does."
me: fuck. [i have ginger issues.] "okay thank you! uhhhhh maybe we can get the sorbet?? or the death by chocolate cake. or the napoleon sounds good!"


pause.


"okay nevermind. we're getting the coconut torte."


sometimes, it's perfectly okay to be a predictable eater.

even peta approves!




friend: "when peta likes something, that makes me want to like it less."

...including animals?




True Bistro
1153 Broadway
Somerville, MA
truebistroboston.com

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